Things I have realized, learned, or confirmed

I am sure I will add more to this list as time goes on. 

1.  Pants get too long before they get too big.  But then I don't sew, and by the time I'd get them hemmed, they'd probably then be too big on me.

2.  At a smaller size, clothes that are more snug are more forgiving.  At my original weight, I wore everything baggy to cover the bumps and try to, I guess, "hide" the weight.   Now when I try a shirt on and it feels tight going over my head and through my arms, most of the time still fit when I do put it on all the way.

3.  People do treat me differently (better).  We can have an argument, and you may say that it's only because I am now a happier person and I have changed, but I don't think I was unhappy before, and it doesn't explain attitudes of strangers and new people I meet.  It's fine.  Truthfully, people can't help but get impressions based on people's looks.  You try not to, but it's just human nature.  When I make a suggestion (same suggestions presented in the same way I have always done), more students try them rather than blow me off.

4.  Even though I'm still tired (because I don't get enough sleep) I still get more accomplished.

5.  My mind is sharper.  I usually always have a comeback for my sassy students that "shuts them down" without alienating.  I have better answers to quick questions. 

6.   However, my center of gravity is changing, and I often feel wobbly/out-of-balance.  It's weird.

7.   Most important, I know that I would have NEVER lost this weight without the surgery.  Let me explain.  This surgery cut my stomach by 75%.  I have 25% of my original stomach, which holds 3-4 oz of food.  That means it held up to 16 oz before (2 cups).  Programs like Weight Watchers encourage you to eat high volume, low calorie food; thus, always "filling up" your stomach.  I don't think it ever gives your stomach a chance to shrink.  I think if you have a small amount of weight to lose (50 lb. or less), your stomach isn't as stretched out, and these programs can work.  But I think for a person like me to truly lose it and keep it off, they would have to eat small volume, high density food (high protein, low fat, low carb...like I am eating now).  But, that means that your stomach never gets filled, and then your brain kicks in, whispering or screaming "Fill the void, fill the void, fill the void."  And then you fail.  Now with this smaller stomach, I can be satisfied with a small amount, and better quality food, and be done.

8.  With that being said, every month I still crave chocolate.  But I can eat 4 hershey kisses (100 calories) and be done and fine.  Not 12 mini peanut butter cups like I used to have. 

9.  Junk food around the house does not bother me AT ALL.  I can eat one chip and be fine, or no junk at all.  What bothers me is not being able to finish a cup of soup and a salad at Big Boy without getting overfilled.

10.  I can be hungry on my whole way home from work, and still survive. 

11.  People say "Oh, I can think of lots of worse problems than having to buy new clothes."  I love buying new work clothes and cute things.  But consider this.  I bought stuff in September that's now too big already.  I may have to buy all new clothes 5 more times before this school year is up, which means time AND money.  AND having to buy new underwear, bras, pajamas, bathing suits, coats, jackets, sweat shirts, sweatpants, and even shoes.  And resizing my wedding ring.  It really adds up to a lot of time and money.  Which is why I hit Salvation Army.  But I wouldn't buy a bathing suit, undergarments, or pajamas there. 

12.  Obvious things, but what I have experienced:  I don't have to pee as often.  My feet don't hurt as much.  I don't really get stomachaches.

13.  I do miss pop.  But I wouldn't drink diet, and regular is not an option.  So I will not indulge.  I drink water, iced tea, coffee (with cream), milk (with protein powder), and sometimes Crystal Light type drinks.

14.  Most people have been very supportive or cordial about my decision to go with surgery.  Nobody has said anything totally ridiculous to me.  :-)  Probably the only wary-looking people are the ones that are in the category of needing to lose 20-60 pounds.  Not a candidate for the surgery, but still dealing with issues of choosing the right method and sticking with it.  So perhaps they feel like they wish there was an easy option for them.  Trust me, this is not easy.  It's still a lot of work, decision-making, and takes time and effort. 

Many milestones

Today, at 15.5 weeks since the start of the two-week pre-surgery prep, I have lost 50% of what I want to lose.  Yeah, halfway there!  Also, my "classification" just moved from "Class II Obese" to "Class I Obese."  All of the clothes that I bought at the start of the school year are getting too big on me.  I just made another big purchase at Salvation Army.  I got almost 20 things for around $75.  I bought all size 18, maybe a couple 16's, and 1x.  Some of the things are too small, but I also noticed that when you are smaller, things that are a little snug are more forgiving.  I would have never worn anything classified as "snug" at my starting weight.  Now I can, and it doesn't look that bad. 

None of my 8th grade students that had me last year have said anything to me, though a few have looked me up and down.  I think they don't want to be rude by asking, or some of them (especially boys) just don't really notice, or maybe care about it, and that's totally okay with me.  I noticed with my 7th graders, I am getting more compliments on clothes, earrings, hair, etc, than I used to.

That's about it for now...